I am lucky enough to go wherever I want, and do whatever [...]]]> I’ve regretted saying that. Because so am I. Or at least so I understand. Why just comment? I am weak unless I do something about it. I’ve given myself and you the ability to respond to that claim. That’s all we can do.

I am lucky enough to go wherever I want, and do whatever I want to do, for the most part. I can jump and travel a few inches into the air, which is more than a number of people can say. I can dive a few meters below the surface of the water, and that also is more than a number. We can evolve. It has been taught. It has been taut. But we can evolve. And maybe we can choose to do so.

You are better than I am, and we can count the ways. But we won’t. We can if you want to though, so just let me know if you’d like to do that. But I think we can probably get by without. We will know the differences in our own little ways. You can believe in your life and I can believe in mine. It’s how we get by.

I love you and want to ride those horses again. I’d also be fine with just petting their snouts. But riding is especially good.

Shipping Dance Mom Wars
Moms Who Wear Brooches
Moms Who Wear Wristwatches
Little Baby Brothers
Little Baby Brothers and Poopy Pants
Farty Poopy, Poopy Farty
Jim’s Hand is a Hand
Shit-talking Dads
[...]]]> I’ve been inspired by the handful of advertisements on my way to work this morning:

Shipping Dance Mom Wars
Moms Who Wear Brooches
Moms Who Wear Wristwatches
Little Baby Brothers
Little Baby Brothers and Poopy Pants
Farty Poopy, Poopy Farty
Jim’s Hand is a Hand
Shit-talking Dads
Dads Who Talk Trash
Dads Who Take the Trash Out in the Morning and Do the Dishes because the Moms Make the Meals
Mominators
Blah-blah blah-blah, Blah-blah blah-BLAH!

Any others? This is fun and is sure to be useful and meaningful to us all.

If you’re like me, you still hold on to the instinct of slamming the phone down to end a conversation that’s upsetting. That instinct, however, doesn’t work out too well when you bring smartphones into the equation. Smartphones for dumb people prove problematic. I [...]]]> Phew, now that we’ve gotten that title out of the way…

If you’re like me, you still hold on to the instinct of slamming the phone down to end a conversation that’s upsetting. That instinct, however, doesn’t work out too well when you bring smartphones into the equation. Smartphones for dumb people prove problematic. I am dumb, I always say.

OK, OK, enough of that, let’s be mature, not so self-deprecating, not harp on the mistakes we’ve made, rather try to figure out how we proceed from here. Moving forward, I can’t even end the call after slamming the phone down and breaking the LCD screen because I can’t see shit. “Patrick….Patrick….are you there?” Yikes, backfire. Wait for the hangup. OK, there it is. Vibrate, vibrate. Clearly some textual retorts are coming in from my lovely, temporary adversary. What could they possibly be? Will I ever know? I HAVE to know what they are, but how?

It all might have been a little easier if I had in fact rooted the phone in my unsuccessful attempts a few days earlier, when I wasn’t blind. But alas, the truth must be accepted: I am dumb…ah, I mean I must find a way to get the SMS messages from my phone without rooting and/or while being blind.

By the way, I just wanted to take a moment to apologize to all of those blind people out there, because I know I’m kinda belittling your condition. I’m certainly not meaning to do such a…oh wait, I don’t think this blog is properly accessible anyway.

I know, get to the point. Assuming you still have touchscreen capability, albeit blindly, you can do the following:

1. Download and install the Android SDK and make sure you can access your phone via ADB upon plugging it in via USB: adb shell.
2. Root your device using this method. I found booting into Charge Mode initially was unnecessary in my case.
3. Voilà, you’re rooted when you run adb shell again. Now, you can run adb pull /data/data/com.android.providers.telephony/databases/mmssms.db ~/Desktop/ to download your messages to your desktop.

Download The SQLite Browser and use it to open the mmssms.db file. You can navigate to the SMS table, browse your most-recent messages, and get up-to-date on the damaging comments that your loved ones or otherwise have sent to you since your phone’s screen met with its untimely death by the hand of rash stupidity.

If you want to import these messages back into a new phone, I leave that up to you. My journey ends here, because what I’ve read I’d like to keep in a temporary directory.

Half-wit is what we often say
Of the ones, should be done away
With a bone and silver tray
Try your luck with faded glee

http://allrecipes.com/Recipe/easy-sugar-cookies/detail.aspx

Add another half-egg and let bake for a bit longer. Poor half-egg.

UPDATE: and don’t forget to sprinkle a little brown sugar on top before putting them in the oven.

And then, maybe, after doing that, you realized that it’s a comparison of two different kinds of movies, and had the thought, “I’m watching [...]]]> Or have you thought that Miller’s Crossing is a better movie than The Godfather? And then realized after watching half of The Godfather that, “Oh, yeah, wait, this movie is better.”

And then, maybe, after doing that, you realized that it’s a comparison of two different kinds of movies, and had the thought, “I’m watching an epic, so I’m not sure I can quite compare. Oh, I see what they’re doing. Life is more pure and correct in the old country. In Europe. Oh man, this movie is about Michael, it isn’t actually about the Godfather.”

OH! Of course. The Godfather!

Endings, continuations are important. “Hope is a good thing. Maybe the best of things. And no good thing ever dies.” That line doesn’t inspire a sequel. Is the point of a good movie to inspire a sequel? I hope not.

Wait, is Miller’s Crossing better than The Godfather?

I can often feel how drastically my memory capability has [...]]]> I was so psyched to see this article in the New York Times on internet usage and its effects on memory. I’ve been thinking about this idea for quite some time, but have continually forgotten to look up info on the topic. Hi ho.

I can often feel how drastically my memory capability has decreased. And it feels scary to be honest. It feels weakening, as if you’re constantly starting anew. A bulk of the information I attain and use comes from quick internet searches about syntax of a programming language here or how to convert character encodings there. This information is generally accesible within seconds while I’m working, and when else would I need it? So, I’ve gotten used to having an external memory drive which is the internet.

And that’s fine if this is isolated to work-related content, but I can’t remember shit about anything anymore. Information feels slippery and I have to seriously concentrate to retain even the smallest thing. I mean, I do have a herniated disk and tendonitis in both my knees, so maybe I can just chalk this up to some accelerated aging disease.